"I have officially LOST IT"...

Where'd everybody go???

Yes, yes...I know...everyone has big problems right now...with the fall-out from the hurricane...getting caught-up at work AFTER the hurricane...family stuff...the cost of living going sky-high..and just "life", in general.

So...I thought I would pipe-in here and share MY day with ya'all...

WHICH...tends to run along the lines of an "I Love Lucy" skit...or "Laverne and Shirley"...except I am without an Ethyl or a Shirley. =( ...Which usually results in all the chaos of a sit-com...yet without the hi-jinx of the "buddy-factor", the canned-laughter, the adoration of a studio audience, the great wardrobe department tricking me out in super-cool stuff...or a team of make-up and hair people...or the big payola at the end of each episode in my paycheck...

NOPE! None of that...just little 'ole me wading thru the mounds of cat fur, litter boxes, cat pee and stuff MUCH WORSE than just plain 'ole "cat pee"!...Plus a veritable kaleidoscope of doggie issues.

Hell..."work" is somewhere in there....and...who has time for a boyfriend? Or the inclination???

Okay...so, "back at the ranch"...

(Gads, I desperately need a Diet Coke!...Hold on for this program interruption...gotta' go forage thru the 'fridge in the garage... ;)...

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..."Aaaahhhhhh!!!" ;o} ....Sooo GOOD!

Okay, on with the show...

Today I had to be at work ultra early...(for me! ;)...I picked up a shift with the Banquet Dept...was supposed to be there at 1pm...but it got switched to 9am.)

So...I got there around 8am...I still had to get the uniform for "Banquets"...which, BTW...is THE UGLIEST uniform EVER! ...Black slacks (my own, thank goodness)...a man's camel-colored, long-sleeved dress shirt, man's black vest, and hideous black and tan tie...WHICH, I had to re-tie about 8 times before I made it look half-way presentable.

The skinny end of the tie actually was longer than the fat end...but I was sick of trying to make it turn out right. Besides, with the vest on, no one could tell, anyway. So, I just tucked the longer, skinny end into my shirt...problem solved!

UGLY...UGLY...UGLY. I look HORRID in browns...and "camel" has got to be THE WORST. Plus, I LOOKED LIKE A BOY!!!...The shirt and vest were too big, there was too much material on the shirt to tuck nicely into my slacks, which resulted in my butt looking all lumpy...plus, I was HOT AS HELL!

YUK.

The casino property has a huge and elegant conference center on the upper-level...massive banquet rooms and monster ballrooms. It is one of THE places for wedding receptions, etc.

Well, today was the Christmas/Holiday party for one of the largest liquor companies in our area..."Glazier-Midwest". They had 2 adjoining ballrooms (with the dividing "curtain" pulled back), all decked-out in Christmas decor. Seriously, it was like Christmas Eve in there...massive Christmas trees all decorated, huge Santas and Frostys around every corner...elves....reindeer...Christmas music by the orchestra...the works!...Very, very cool!

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And, around the ballroom were all of the liquor reps which sell their products thru "Glazier".
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There are basically 3 liquor distributors in the area, that all bars HAVE to buy from...it is against the law to buy from anyone else but the distributors assigned to your sector of the state. It is ESPECIALLY illegal to buy liquor or beer from the grocery store, or liquor store, and sell it in your bar. Total NO-NO! A bar would be majorly fined, and lose its liquor license if they were caught doing that.

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Now, you would think that it would be just the opposite...that allowing distributors to have a monopoly on an area would be the illegal part. However, that is just not the case. So, the 3 distributors in this area are: "Glazier", "Summit", and "Major Brands". And, they all carry different brands of liquor.

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For instance, Glazier carries "Jack Daniels", and none of the others do, etc., etc. Which means that the Jack Daniels people signed a contract with Glazier to represent their brand in this market.

So, when ordering the liquor and beer (there are a few beer distributors, too)...a bar has to order from ALL of the different distributors to be able to stock their club. It's kinda like having to go to 7 different grocery stores to find all of the stuff on your list. (And, that is not even taking into account the different vendors for the non-food items, and the different food vendors...That's a LOT of doing inventory and ordering!... Oy-Vey! ;)

Okay, now that you have all had your crash-course in bar-ordering, I'll continue with boring you to tears ;) ...

So, around the ballroom were all of the liquor vendors which sell their products thru "Glazier"...and there were well over 100 different vendors...all with their huge tables and displays set-up, featuring anywhere from 1 item, to 12 items at each table.

This means that each vendor had sent their reps for this market to this event to showcase their products and whatever NEW products they were coming out with. This was Glazier's party, but it was to invite all the bar-owners/ restaurant owners/ managers/ liquor stores/ grocery stores, etc. to this "trade show", to let them all sample the products, and hopefully either start ordering the new items, or get them to order MORE of what they already carried.

Also, to showcase new ways of mixing and marketing their particular products...new shots which can be made with the liquors, or specialty drinks which they liquors could be utilized for, etc., etc.

So...there were at least 1500 people attending this event, all walking around, and sampling the alcohol...and it was all FREE, FREE, FREE!

It was a lot like the BARTENDER'S BALL, where I reign as Prom Queen each year =) ...however, THIS time I was NOT in a ballgown, and was schlepping crap around like Cinderella! Grrr... What is WRONG with this picture??? ;(

Each vendor supplied their own inventory of liquors, and we had to set each table up with fruit trays, glassware, ice, sodas and juices, straws, napkins, etc.,etc. (And then, we had to constantly walk around the grand ballroom and pick up the trash and glassware...and there was TONS of it! OMG!)

Plus, these people were all drinking for FREE...so they had no compunction about just leaving their drinks "where ever", because they could just get another new fabulous concoction at the next booth.

Also, there were massive food stations set-up across the center of the ballroom...you would not believe the food! Probably something similar to the food on a cruise...

Ice sculptures of massive clam shells, filled with chilled, jumbo shrimp...appetizers galore...fresh fruit and cheeses...just mountains of gourmet edibles. A total first-class presentation.

SO...that meant that there were millions of plates and forks to collect and haul to the "back of the house"...ughhh. I have not waitressed in YEARS...and I hauled these stupid-ass, huge oval trays around today/tonite FOR HOURS! Now, I remember why my arms used to look so killer! ;) (Boy-oh-boy, are they going to be sore as hell tomorrow!) =(

The party started at 1pm...lasted until 9pm...and then we had to clean the disasterous mess up afterward, and break it all down...the tables and chairs, the linens, the skirting for the tables, the flower arrangements, the dishes and glassware, the trash, the buffet, the ice-buckets, and the liquor, etc., etc.

OMG...the "liquor"! ...Yes, the reps all brought their own liquor...hundreds of cases of it! However, whatever they did not give out to the guests, they--by law--could not take back with them.

And, also--by law--we had to throw it all away! (Since my casino did not "order"/buy it from the distributor, we are not allowed to use it, or to let it leave the property...WAAAYYY illegal.)

And there were TONS AND TONS of partial bottles and un-opened bottles that we had to dump down the sinks. We had to open the new bottles...uncork the champagne and wines, and open the liquors...and dump it all out. :O ...OMG...this was some of the major high-dollar crap, too! We dumped out thousands and thousands of dollars worth of liquor and wine tonight!...MANY thousands!

Then, we had to throw all the bottles away...you would not BELIEVE the number of bottles! We just kept filling these huge. rolling dumpsters with them...AND, they do not recycle! It was such a crime, throwing all that glass away, and not recycling it...made me sick, the waste of it all...the money, the product, all that junk in a land-fill...disgusting.

And then, we had to start setting the room up for a private party for "Monsanto" in the morning. (I am working that too...have to be there at 8am...which TOTALLY SUCKS!)

So...I finally left work around 1am (keep in mind I got there at 8am...17 miserable hours...blechhh...

Never sat down, never stopped moving, never had a break, never ate, never peed, barely had time for a quick drink of water...and it was HELL.

PLUS!...I have a nasty blister on the back of my heel! ;(

THIS IS NOT "BARTENDING"!!!! ...How did I get myself INTO this??? Ughhh...

Oh yeah...we did not make tips...it was a straight hourly rate...and I will not see that until my next pay-period...in 2 weeks...AFTER TAXES. (Yay-me.) ;(

So...I finally limped my blistered, tired, grungy hiney out of there around 1am...having sweated my ass off in that ugly shirt, and looking like something the cat puked-up...the curl long ago having fallen out of my pony-tail, and mascara smudges further enhancing the shadows under my eyes. (Which...on ghastly-white skin, is not the best look.)

Oh, yeah...I nearly sliced OFF my finger in the fruit slicer many hours before...bled profusely...(and hurt an INSANE amount...with all that lime juice pouring into the wound!)...Yet, I could not get a band-aid...because I would have to go to "First Aid" for that...and "First Aid" would have to call "Security...since I had "hurt myself" on property...there would be a big-ass report to fill out...and THEN, I would have to take a drug test, to prove that I was not drunk or strung-out when I nearly sliced my finger off.

I don't even drink, smoke, or do drugs!

So, since I did not have the time to go thru all that crap, I just wrapped napkins around my mangled finger, and rubber-banded them on. (We are not even ALLOWED to have band-aids in our possession. Like, I could not bring one from home and keep it in my work bag, or pocket...for "just in case". Is that majorly jacked-up, or what???)

Okay, so I limped my bedraggled self out of there...realized I had lost my phone on the way out...possibly in the employee bathroom when I stopped by the time-clock, to wash my hands and FINALLY pee!

So, back I went...and... NO PHONE!

I ran around like a chicken with my head cut off for about 15 minutes, trying to re-trace my steps...and FINALLY went BACK into the bathroom (after having been in there 3 times already)...and shouted out to, what I thought was an empty room: "Anybody in here find a phone???!!!"

I never actually expected someone to ANSWER!

When, from one of the many stalls, this disembodied voice calls out: "What's it look like?"

OMG!?

"It's PINK!" ...(LOL!...What else? ;)

She replied, "It's at Security...someone already turned it in!"

Holy-smokes! How totally COOL!!! =)

So, I ran back to the Security base, (at the employee elevator, which we ALL have to use to get on-property) and, right there, propped-up in the window, looking forlornly at me as I raced up to the glass, was my little PINK Razer! Woo-Hoo!!!

Thank God!

Okay, so back on the elevator...and to the employee parking level...and headed home!

'Er...actually...had to make a quick stop at Wal-Mart for a few things...I was TOTALLY out of Diet Coke and V-8! :O

I finally got home about 1:45am...

Had to feed ALL of the animals...and they were STARVED! Fed all the cats their canned food (they always have dry food...but only get canned at night, after I get home from work.) The dogs have dry food at all times in their bowl...yet Maya is the only one who ever really eats it. My Lhasas will only eat dry food once in a while...and just a few nibbles...and ONLY if I am right there.

They get their canned food a couple times a day...they will only eat small portions...so they need to eat twice a day...especially Truffle.

Well, Truffle is the only one who will actually eat without being hand-fed...although, he has to have his food cut up into little bite-sized pieces, and spread out on a small towel...plates or bowls scare him....and having the pieces of food touch each other freak him out too...it is too hard for him to eat it, if it is all in a pile.

And...Skittle and Beuford have to be hand-fed...piece-by-freaking-piece. LOL! That's okay though...it is part of my bonding time with my babies. =) ...Seriously...they will NOT eat, unless I hand-feed them...I am not kidding...DAYS would go by, and they still would not eat anything! I cannot afford more vet bills for sick dogs...I NEED them to eat healthily.

Okay...so, I fed the cats and the dogs...and then the dogs have to IMMEDIATELY go outside...their little digestive tracts spring into action right-quick...and once they eat anything...it is time to "go"...like, NOW.

(Okay...they "went"...and came back in.)

I failed to mention that when I got home, the smell of my precious little baby-girl, Skittle, was enough to (as my mommy says): "GAG A MAGGOT!" :O...Ughhh...SOOO GROSS! ;(

Yep...one night with Boomer "monitoring" them, and she apparently quite merrily rolled around in what was probably the equivalent to a putrid, decaying dinosaur! Or...maybe just some rabbit guts (damn Maya, out there killing bunnies again!)...it was definitely blood and gore and the worst smell on the planet! No wonder Vultures can smell that crap from miles and miles away! YUK!

Okay, so then after Skittle went outside and pottied, I had to park her little stinky butt in my bathroom, while I rounded-up the Oatmeal Doggie Shampoo (with "long lasting Vanilla scent"! ...Or so the label said. I beg to differ on that! Yeek.)...plus several towels, the doggie brush, and my hairdryer.

Bath-time was NOT fun...especially at 2:30 am...on my knees, bent over the edge of my tub, and getting drenched, as my stinky little baby looked at me like I was torturing her! The poor little, itty-bitty, drowned rat, that she was!

Plus, my back is KILLING me...and all that leaning over the tub was grueling. ;(

Okay...I THOROUGHLY cleaned her...and then "RINSED AND REPEATED!...And then Rinsed again!"

I towel-dried her off, numerous times...in between all of the bouts of shaking from nose to tail...and spraying millions of little droplets of water all over me. I brushed her out, cleaned out her ears, made sure the water was all out of her ears (ear infections are so NASTY!), trimmed a few mats out of her ears, cleaned her eyes out, trimmed the hair away from her eyes, used a little "wipie" to make sure her little hiney was "Sanitized"!...and then commenced with the blow-drying.

And after all that...YEP...she still smelled! Not NEARLY as bad as before...but definitely NOT like "Vanilla"!

I washed off her little pink leather collar with the little pink rhinestones and little pink heart-shaped tag (what else did you expect? ;) ...with Clorox Bathroom cleaner...for it smelled vile, as well. It no longer smells, but the bleach turned her little pink rhinestones all cloudy...drats! =(

Once that was all done, I opened my bathroom door, and she sprinted out of there like her tail was on fire!...And then there was a whole lot more shaking from nose to butt (HER...not me! ;)...Beuford was hot on her tail, with his nose up her butt, giving her the once-over...while Truffle was hiding under my coffee table, desperately trying to look as "clean", and smell as "non-Vulture worthy" as he could! LOL! ;)

I then had to wash out my tub with spray-bleach, change into my sweats, brush my teeth, wash my face, and then...

...totally STRIP my bed...for she had "funkified" the sheets, covers, and pillows! I tossed those into the washer and had to rummage around for more sheets and covers, and re-make it all...as the dogs kept hopping up there under the sheets, like it was all a game...they do that EVERY time! LOL! ;)


TIME CHECK: 3:20am.

I FINALLY headed downstairs to the kitchen, to relax for a few minutes with a much-earned Diet Coke... and maybe check my email and MySpace.

I plunked down at the kitchen counter, fired-up Boom's lap-top, and barely had time to enter my password, when "Cookie Monster" (my 20+ pound, domestic-long-haired, 5-year old, totally rambunctious cat...but probably the smartest, too), sprinted down the steps to see what I was up to...

He vaulted up onto the counter, slid behind the lap-top, and finally skidded to a stop right before he ended up in my lap.

And...THAT is when I SMELLED "IT"!!! :O

OMG!!!!!

And I thought that SKITTLE had smelled bad! Blechhh!!!

The smell rapidly slammed up my nostrils, wreaking havoc and destruction upon my olfactory senses...as it quickly spread up into my eyeballs...effectively making them bleed. YUK!

Allrightey then!

I squinched my nose and eyes...hoping that maybe if I exposed less of my actual eyeballs, and less of the insides of my nose, to what was assaulting it, maybe it would not smell as bad...no such luck.

Okay...I lifted his ENORMOUS tail, and dreadfully checked-out what I was dealing with.

Uh...apparently...the Apocalypse. ;(

That cat has LOOOONNNGGGG fur...and there was an ABUNDANCE of what I can only term as: CAT POOP!...Smeared all over hell and back...

Welcome to my world. ;)

I desperately wanted my mommy!

I knew that it would require several calf-ropers, a team of groomers with gas masks, and a few sedatives (for ME, and for HIM)...to effectively deal with that disaster. There was NO WAY in hell that cat was going to hold still and let me deal with that.

However, what was I going to do, huh? I could not just LEAVE him like that.

So, I grabbed the scissors and paper towels, and wrestled him to the kitchen floor. Not an easy feat, since I knew that I would not be able to actually GET UP again.

So, I was able to cut some of it out, before he shredded me from stem to stern with those lethal back claws of his. And, he is about as strong and agile as a kangaroo...so, even though I valiantly fought "the good fight"...my 9 good fingers eventually went down in flames. He had just about completely severed my already sliced finger... yay me.

As I attempted to haul my ass back up off the kitchen floor, I was seriously considering just STAYING there...and maybe sleeping on the throw-rug in front of the dishwasher. However, I still had to flush what I WAS able to manage to remove from his butt...the smell was certainly NEVER going to allow me to sleep!...

AND...as Cookie Monster streaked off thru the dining room, in full-shriek, like the Hounds of Hell were after him...they kinda WERE. Of course, when the rest of the fur-balls heard the ruckus, they had to investigate...and when that cat hauled-ass outta' there, it was like an engraved invitation to be CHASED. And my group...they never fail to respond.

Usually not a big deal...however, with Truffle, he is SERIOUS about the chase, and he goes full-on tackle/attack when he finally catches the "runner". So, I had to jump my decrepit ass up off the floor, and race off after them all, to prevent kitty-carnage. Like I said...I CANNOT afford another huge vet bill.

PLUS...I did NOT want to wake up Boomer! That would not have been pretty.

Okay, I finally caught the little (huge) sucker...and tossed him into his bedroom. He was not going to be infecting the entire house. I already had to spray-bleach off the counters, floor, and scissors...not to mention my HANDS!

TIME CHECK: 3:25am.

So, at that point I knew that I had to call my vet/groomer at 7am when they open, to BEG them to take Cookie and his sister "Twinkie" tomorrow, to groom them. (I have them shaved a couple times a year...and I really should have done this by now...totally my fault.)

However, my vet has to sedate them for the groomer to be able to groom them...and they have to do blood-work on the cats if they are going to sedate...and they have to be current on their shots, too...which are due this month...SOOO...to get all the shots for both cats, do blood-work, sedate and groom...that's about $600...at least.

Yep...sucks...however, it is the price I pay to have pets...ESPECIALLY long-haired ones!

(Oh, yeah...as kittens and puppies, they are so adorable, with their fluffly hair...but much more of a hassle when they are older.)

However...I adore them all...and they come first...so, it is off to the vet tomorrow...and then, immediately to work, to slave away at yet another awful party...in the world's most hideously ugly outfit, once again looking like a boy...for no tips...picking up trash and dirty dishes...with my monster blister...and 9 fingers...and swollen and arthritic knees...and pasty white skin...

...Good times. =)

Okay...so...I finally checked my email and MySpace...and NO ONE has said one damn thing! ALL DAY today...and NIGHT, too!

I go thru all that for NOTHING?!?! Sheesh.

Then, I start typing this...what was supposed to be a relatively brief missive...(yeah...right...since when have I ever written anything "BRIEF"???)...When, what to my wondering eyes should appear, but a Cookie Monster, vaulting back onto the counter???

Yes, the little shit is so tall and strong...and SMART as hell!...That, unless I lock his bedroom door, he can stand up and hit the levered-door knob, and open the damn door!

I thought I had locked the door, but apparently not...or he has finally learned to unlock it, too! LOL! ;)

Back into his room he goes...and back to my email I go.

And I type like half of this message...and "save" as I go...when suddenly I lose it! I check in my "drafts" folder...praying that it is still there...and, yes, it is...however, about a THIRD of it did not make the "save". Crap!

Yes, I re-typed it all...and now, it is so freaking LONG, that I am toying with the idea of pasting it to my blog...which I may yet do...

Although, I still feel like torturing you all by sending it off via email!

However...I also realize that none of you are actually still READING this... I am sure I lost you all at: "CAT POOP"! ;)

TIME CHECK: 5 am.

Nope...there will be no sleep tonight. For some reason, I apparently still think I am
22, or something...and can just "go, go, go!"...which I have done for YEARS! Now, it is catching up to my broken-down ass...

Again..."yay me".

Okay...I am going to hit "SEND" here...and hope I do not manage to totally crash Yahoo-mail with it.

Then, I am going to mix up a Molotov Cocktail of Glucosamine and Chondroiton to hopefully help lube my creaky joints...slap on the ICY HOT, and then slowly crawl back up the steps, to get in the shower for work again.

Weeeee....!!!

Tune in tomorrow for more inane blithering...I know you are just dying to find out how that whole "groomer"-thing goes!

Oh yeah...that's right...you are not even still READING this, anymore!

*UPDATE: Well, I have wasted even more time, pasting this to my blog, and then tooling around on Photobucket, in search of cutesy little pics to add to it. Plus, there was even more proof-reading...and several glaring errors to be fixed...(I hope I caught them all! ;)

Time check: 6am.

Yep...I have totally lost it! ;)

XO!
=)

Bliss on a Stick! ;) ...

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There is a magical quality to the air recently...it occurs every year about this time.
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It is the hint of promises yet fulfilled...of new and purity...of wishes and dreams.
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It is HALLOWEEN SEASON! ;)
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Yes, I stand by my belief that this time of year heralds songs unsung, promises unspoken, and destiny yet to be fulfilled.
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This time of year is MORE like "New Year's Eve" to me...with limitless possibilities and the excitement of new and wondrous adventures propelling it along.
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Why?
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Well, it starts the same way every year, and it is just as exhilarating every time...
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It begins with the change in the air. With that faint, North wind blowing in... rustling the grass, and tinging the leaves on the tress...just beginning to tweak them towards their pallet of brilliant oranges, vibrant reds, golds, yellows, and burnt umbers.
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A long, hot Summer behind us, and the citrus-twist of Fall wafting slowly through the air...just the beginnings of the change-of-seasons eliciting excitement.
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The air quality changes...becomes crisper, sweeter, fresher...and invigorates my soul from within...rustling up the depths of memories...memories built and cherished from every year at this time.
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This phenomena began the day I was born...HALLOWEEN! =) ...The BEST of all days to have been born! =)
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As a kid, it was GLORIOUS!...
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It was always a special occasion...it seemed as if everyone in the world was celebrating with me.
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My child's eyes looked at it this way: It was THE BEST day to be born...everyone partied with you, and you did not get screwed-out of presents! ;) LOL! ...
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...Unlike those poor Christmas-time babies...with the one gift for both occasions...your birthday gift always being wrapped in gilt Christmas paper.
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I ALWAYS had costume-themed birthday parties, I ALWAYS dressed-up, ALWAYS had a Halloween-themed birthday cake, ALWAYS went trick-or-treating, and ALWAYS received loads of candy in my orange, plastic jack-o-lantern.
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I remember I was a witch for MANY Halloweens in a row. My wonderful grandma (whom could do ANYTHING!...Sew, paint, cook, had a magical green thumb, and was AMAZING! =)...
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Well, Grandma made witch costumes for my sister and I, when I was about 6, and they were WONDERFUL!...
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...If I close my eyes, I can still smell the thick, black fabric...and, oh yes, it DEFINITELY had a certain fragrance to it. Maybe it was because it smelled like Grandma's house...like roses, lavender, and ivy...Grandma's house always smelled like roses and lavender.
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My sister and I already had the long, black hair...so the witch-theme was a natural progression. I loved it too, BECAUSE I was born on Halloween...and I truly believed myself to BE a witch...still do! ;)
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And then, there were the years when those store-bought, plastic costumes were all the rage...with the thin, plastic smock, complete with a stamped design of whatever character you wanted to be...
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...and to top it all off, was that thin, plastic mask. The mask which covered your face, had a rubber-band across the back of your head, and only tiny slits for eye holes and a mouth hole.
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That would NEVER fly these days! Those masks were a complete safety hazard...you could not see, and you could barely BREATHE! ;)
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Never-the-less, I loved them completely...I recall that I used to stick the tip of my tongue out thru the little mouth hole, feeling the sharpness of the plastic...and building up quite the wall of steam behind the thing! ...Which, made that whole breathing-business all the more tedious! ;)
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Ah well...even then, I subscribed to the motto of: "It is better to LOOK good, than to FEEL good!" (Thank you very much, Billy Crystal, for voicing what I inherently knew, yet could never quite accurately convey. ;)
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My little "CASPER THE FRIENDLY GHOST", and "WONDER WOMAN*" costumes were two of my favorites! =)
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I have dressed-up in full-regalia EVERY YEAR of my life, for Halloween...I could not imagine doing otherwise.
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My costumes have become more extreme...custom-designed and sewn by some of the best seamstresses around. My sister even helped me to create a few...I the designer, she the seamstress.
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They were gorgeous costumes...
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Oh, BTW...I simply HAD to be a Disney heroine/princess every year there for a while. That was when Disney had a new animated movie out each year, and the heroines almost always resembled me! ;)
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So...they included:
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~"SNOW WHITE"...(go figure, huh? ;)
~"ESMERELDA" from "THE HUNCHBACK OF NOTRE DAME"
~"JASMINE" from "ALADDIN"
~"MEGARA" from "HERCULES"
~"POCAHONTAS"
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~And then, I had to be "DARKWING DUCK", as well...LOL! ;)..."The Terror That Flaps in the Night!" =) ... It was a COOL costume.
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Now, of course, I have my full-on, jacked-up, authentically-fab WONDER WOMAN regalia!...and it is INSANE! ;) ...NOT a "costume"...the real deal! ...Remember?...I AM Wonder Woman*! ;)
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So, every year...about this time...when the air changes to candy corn breezes, and the corn stalks and hay bales dot the landscape...with scarecrows and pumpkins peeping out from their midst, it signals the beginning of my new search for THE costume...a heady feeling indeed...WAY better than designing a wedding dress...I get to do this EVERY year!
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I exploded into happiness yesterday, when I went to Dierberg's (our local, high-end grocery store chain)...I approached the entryway, and immediately spied the abundance of fresh Mums strewn about the patio area...blossoming in hues of reds and oranges.
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I walked through the automatic doors, and there...between the two sets of doors, was an eye-dazzling delight of festive orange!...It was the display of MINI-PUMPKINS! :o}
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I carefully examined them, for just the "right" one...the perfect little pumpkin, expressing a totally round, slightly squat shape, with a pert little stem on top. =)
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Finding my prize, I set the little jewel carefully in my cart.
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Ahhh...the 1st pumpkin of the season! Certainly the smallest, but definitely the cutest...and this one will last me through the Thanksgiving holidays, for sure...they always do. =)

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I will scour the pumpkin farms this season...as every season...culminating my journey at "ROMBACH'S FARM"...the Crown Jewel of pumpkin patches!... .
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...Resplendent with acres of pumpkins, hay rides, straw bale mazes, haunted attractions, spooky music, a giant mountain of enormous pumpkins, an outdoor barbecue area...plus cold beer, cider, and soda for sale...
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Oh!...also, a "pumpkin launcher"-catapult thingy--certain to thrill the kids, and the NASCAR-shirt-wearing, pick-up truck driving, mullet-sporting guys alike!
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(*NOTE TO SELF: The pumpkin farm is NOT the place to pick up a guy! ...Eeewwwww...)
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So!...
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...I ALWAYS have to buy THE biggest, most perfect pumpkin I can find...hundreds of pounds of pure, pumpkin-carving bliss! And, ooohhhh...the yummy pumpkin seeds I make out of those! Mmmm... :o}
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Many years, I have had MULTIPLE monster pumpkins...but now I try to keep it to just one massive pumpkin. However, I know that THIS year I need to buy TWO...one for Boomer, and one for myself.
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I DO NOT share pumpkin cleaning and carving duties. It MUST be PERFECT...and it MUST be MY WAY! LOL! ;) We are both too much of the "project manager type"...total control-freaks...so there is NO SHARING of the pumpkins.
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I learned that LAST year... he TOTALLY needs his own. ;) ...I am WAY more of a perfectionist than he is, ESPECIALLY when it comes to design/decorating. (Uh, yeah...possibly his own Christmas tree would be a good thing, too... ;)


.***(NOTE FROM TEACHERS: "Little Glitter Girl does not play well with others...although she MANAGES her play-group very adeptly!" ;)***
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Okay, so back to my sojourn into Dierberg's yesterday...the initial SOURCE of the inspiration for this blog...
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I continued on into the store...wheeling my grocery cart towards the produce department...and then...BAM!...
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...Nirvana beckoned from the little cooler-case display across from the Courtesy Counter...
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...THE PURE, CARAMELLY-BLISS THAT IS THE ~"MERB'S CARAMEL BIONIC APPLE"!~
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LAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!! ...(Uh, that's the Heavens opening and the angels singing! ;) ...
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...LAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!! ...YIPPPPPPEEEEEE!!! :o}
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I was IMMEDIATELY transported to a feeling of divine RAPTURE!
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The "Merb's Bionic Apple"...an amazing and colossal creation of our local "Merb's Candy Company"...and a staple of my Halloweens since I was a kid.
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The Bionic Apple is an enormous Granny Smith Apple, double-dipped in the smoothest, butteriest, most succulent home-made caramel you will ever taste!
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...Then, 3/4 of the dipped apple is rolled in toasted, meaty pecan halves. The pecans are fresh and thick, and slightly salty...just salty enough to perfectly complement the divine sweetness of the buttery caramel.
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Heaven-on-a-stick, baby...no doubt about it.
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These colossal jewels are individually wrapped in their own little plastic baggies, tied off with a red ribbon-bow, and priced at a lofty $5...(which for here, is kinda steep)...especially since they USED to be 2 for $5...but, then again...EVERYTHING has sky-rocketed, has it not?
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I will totally forego an extra gallon of gas in my tank, in lieu of this divinity. ;)
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The caramel apple season only lasts until just after Thanksgiving...and then they disappear until this time next year.
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Which, is just about the right amount of time to allow me to get over foundering myself on them, and make me salivate for more, once again. ;)
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Damn, I love the Halloween season. (Just too bad that now it also means I am going to be yet another freaking year OLDER...ughhh...I am SOOO not liking the Yin/Yang dichotomy of THAT...makes it a little harder to get my verve' on to it! ;)
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However!...I will muddle thru! ;) LOL!...
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So, as I spun my cart through the produce department, I conjured up all the possibilities of how THIS Halloween season was going to be EVEN BETTER...brighter, more fantastic, and more ethereally magical.
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What a heady feeling. =)
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Halloween marks the beginning of that mystical and delightful season that is the Holidays...
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...which, to me, had always meant a new school year...and then those fabulous, well-earned BREAKS from that same school year!...There is NOTHING like the excitement leading up to Christmas Vacation!
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Hell, I feel like going back to school, just to experience that feeling again! ;)
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Of course, there are the actual holidays, themselves...
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~HALLOWEEN...(when the major department stores always start decking-the-halls with all the Christmas schwag. ;)...
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~THANKSGIVING...and Mom's yummy Thanksgiving dinner...
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~CHRISTMAS...with all the magical glory it beholds...
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...OMG...and do not even get me started on the Christmas season!...And the glitter, the majesty, the CHRISTMAS CAROLS!!! *SIGH*...God, I love it! =)
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And then, finally...
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~NEW YEAR'S EVE...the grand-daddy of ALL fresh-starts!
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So, Halloween has always brought forth these feelings of untamped excitement and wonder...wonder of what is yet to come.
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To ME, THAT has always seemed the perfect starting point for a new beginning...a new fantastical holiday season...which can be anything I choose to make it.
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I figure I have a 4-month jump on the rest of the world, making their New Year's resolutions...
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...While *I* am WISHING UPON A PUMPKIN! ...(It *IS* "THE GREAT PUMPKIN, CHARLIE BROWN"! ;) ...Linus was TOTALLY RIGHT! And, hey...'ya just GOTTA' love that SNOOPY! =)
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...While I have started fresh with that first bite into the first caramel apple of the season...as I let the sweet and tangy juices run down my chin like a little kid...washing away all my sins, and the gloom of the past year...
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...(That's one powerful apple! ...Hey, it's not called a "BIONIC" apple, for nothing! ;)
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...The possibilities are ENDLESS!

At a Political Crossroads...

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I have been diligently conducting my research on Governor Sarah Palin...to ascertain WHAT, exactly, it is which she stands for...and AGAINST.

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I must say that I am more than a bit disappointed that she is WAY on the socialist conservative side of the playing field...very much against Reproductive Rights, and a big supporter of the NRA.

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I, as many Americans (from what I have read), have mistakenly believed Senator John McCain to be more on the moderate side of the fence, with more support towards reproductive rights for women.

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Alas, this is certainly NOT the case...McCain's past Congressional voting record has been VERY anti-choice.

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Actually, not JUST anti-choice, but he has leveraged a full-sweeping attack against the rights of ALL reproductive choices for women...

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McCain has voted:

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*AGAINST Family Planning.

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*AGAINST Freedom of Access to Clinics.

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~This has fallen under the "Violence Against Women" area...which is astounding to hear..."violence"...INDEED!

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*AGAINST Funding for Teen Pregnancy Prevention.

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~I cannot even BELIEVE that! The teens of today are far too promiscuous, and this is certainly NOT helped any by the media and movies which GLORIFY teen pregnancy, such as that atrocity "Juno"...which is just stupid, at best.

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However, many of the parents of those same knocked-up teens were child mothers themselves. .

I heap a lot of the blame upon ineffective, lax, and horrid parenting skills.If these kids are not learning how to be SMART from their parents, then they need to learn it from SOMEONE/SOMEWHERE. And THAT is what TEEN PREGNANCY PREVENTION is all about.

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Many of these same teens, who think it is a "good idea at the time", admit later in life that they WISH they had chosen differently...chosen more wisely...been educated about the consequences to their immature actions.

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ALL of these issues have proven McCain to be VERY EXTREME in his voting patterns AGAINST Reproductive Health Issues for Women...a pattern which worries me greatly.

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I am thrilled that he is at least on-board, to an extent, with stem-cell research.

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McCain DID vote in FAVOR of:

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*Expanding Federal Funding of Embryonic Stem-Cell Research. However, I wonder how long it would be for him to change his tune on that? How long before the Socialist Conservative zealots sway him totally into their camp?

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What dismays me is that Governor Palin seems to be even MORE conservative that HE is...and this man is the one whom would be appointing any further Supreme Court Justices...Justices who are in it to "win it"...and for "life" terms.

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These are are the men and women who uphold our laws, or overturn our laws.

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In my opinion, there are just some HARD-FOUGHT, and HARD-WON battles which have been inscribed in law, which should NEVER be over-turned.

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I have always considered myself a Republican...yet my path is NOT that of a straight line. My course is complex, and I veer towards the conservative side at times, and then I turn the opposite way, into the Liberal light at others.

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I am proud to be a "Liberal Republican"...to me, it is the best compromise I can make.

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However, what do you do when you are at a crossroads regarding the candidates?

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I have a strong opinion regarding:

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~Immigration issues

~Reproductive Rights for Women issues

~Health Care

~Gun Control

~The Death Penalty

~War and Homeland Security

~Economic Stability

~Welfare...etc.,etc.

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Like I said...I have MY opinions, and they are VERY STRONG ONES...and they are opinions based out of the beliefs of BOTH political parties...so that leaves me torn.

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Do I chose the "lesser of two evils"...of conflicting topics in opposing factions? And, if so, then WHICH "evils" do I choose?...WHICH main issues do I choose as the PRIMARY issues?

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There really will be no "happy medium" in this race, for the opponents--as well as their VP-nominees--are just as extreme.

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Now, with that said, I know that MANY of you hold very near and dear to your hearts the COMPLETELY OPPOSITE beliefs which I do...and that is your prerogative.

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I completely respect the opinions of others. I am not here to bash, argue, or hold in contempt. I am merely trying to sort this out.

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I have only 1 vote...a vote which will surely be cancelled-out by the voter in the booth to my left or my right.

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However, it is a vote which I honor, and a process which I respect. I do not want to blindly cast my vote in any one direction...for I have to live with my decision for the next 4 years...possibly 8...and potentially forever, depending on which Supreme Court Justices are appointed.

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*SIGH*...This is going to be a long Autumnal season, until the election in November.

RNC, Governor Palin, and Gustav...OH, MY!...

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As the Republican National Convention is set to kick-off, and we are yet to hear from McCain and his brand-spanking new VP nominee, Governor Sarah Palin-Alaska.

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Our meteorological system is in flux, set to go into full-blown hay-wire mode with the encroachment of Hurricane Gustave in the Gulf, headed straight for Louisiana...which is still reeling from the lasting effects of that bitch Katrina, and the war-zone which remains much of the wards surrounding New Orleans.

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I was all aflutter over McCain's selection for his running-mate...not having enough information on Governor Palin, and concerned that the rest of the voting public was just as uninformed as I on Gov. Pain, her political stance, political history, and just overall...her strength as a candidate on the Republican ticket.

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Okay, so I have been doing research...and will continue to follow the issues, learning what I can, and furrowing out the rest...as I hope everyone does.

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While I am aware that politics makes strange bed-fellows, and that it is really not socially polite to share ones' political views within mixed company...I believe it is important to stand for SOMETHING...to be INFORMED on the issues, and to be able to BACK your beliefs, if needed.

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I do not shove my political beliefs and designs down the throats of those around me...I do NOT want to offend any of my friends who take just as strong of an OPPOSING stance.

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Although, that does not preclude me from quite merrily shoving those same beliefs down the throats of my family and friends which live nearby...ANNNDDDD I do it with much zeal and delight in our debates! LOL!

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Thank God my immediate family pretty much is on the same page...or it would be a blood-bath! ;)

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That is all well and good...like I said...just STAND FOR SOMETHING...and then be prepared to defend that...the WHY'S & WHERE FOR'S of it all. I totally respect everyone's views...and their beliefs...as long as they HAVE them.

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I do NOT get into the rampant and blatant mud-slinging towards ANY candidate/political party, just for the sake of taking a side, and getting in the mud.

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So, to each his/her own...and truly, may the BEST party prevail...the one which is BEST for ALL OF US...for our COUNTRY.

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So, yes, I will most assuredly be tossing my comments into the ring from time to time...as I hope others will, too.

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Discussion is GOOD...at least talking about our system is bringing the blood surging back into it, reviving what--to some--is only a topical issue once every four years.

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Now, on the eve of the RNC, our country, especially those in the South, is forced to deal with the very real threat of Hurricane Gustav. I doubt that the GOP's Convention will pack the glitterati of the Democratic National Convention's...with their "Political Karaoke" (Holy-crap, did you all SEE that shit? Insane, hysterical Karaoke contests, where the contestants recited the SPEECHES of the candidates! LOL! Too much.)

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The DNC also had turned their convention into the place to "be seen" for many celebs...(not to mention the ones PERFORMING there.) I mean, come on!...The Olson waifs? That nit-wit Heidi what's-her-name, from THE HILLS, and her equally androgynous leech of a boyfriend? I have my reticence regarding a party which has the likes of them, and many others, as their political hangers-on.

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President Bush, and Vice President Cheney will not be attending this year's convention, in order for the disaster preparedness for Hurricane Gustav. I do wish that we could hear from the President and the Vice President, however, they will be doing their job...not whooping-it-up on-stage at the convention.

It will be interesting to see what the RNC rolls-out for THEIR party...the GRAND OLD PARTY.

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I will be worriedly flicking the channels between Convention news, and tracking Gustav...and praying for EVERYONE involved...especially those poor, innocent animals in the path of the storm...God rest their souls...